We had so many amazing NICU nurses for Hayden but my favorite one that I could talk to and we had a lot would have to be Melissa. Melissa made it so Hayden was her primary baby. If she was working Hayden was her baby that she would look after all day. And she would. But she wasn’t just there for Hayden. I could talk to her and she looked out for me  I remember not taking care of myself and I think she could see it because she told me I had to take care of myself so I could take care of Hayden. I was told to go take a break and get some rest and eat my mom and I both didn’t want to but they had a nanny come in to snuggle the babies when parents needed to get a break. So my mom, sister and I went to the cafeteria to eat.

I can’t remember if it was the same day but Melissa informed us that “Dick” needed to listen when told to stop messing with Hayden tubes and wires because he wasn’t listening and kept doing it. So I tried telling him and Everytime he would go see Hayden he kept messing with them even when he had been told by nurses, my mom, and me to stop so the nurses had to make a rule since they could not trust him alone with Hayden anymore that he was not allowed to be in with Hayden unless someone else would be in there too. I thought it was pretty sad that Hayden’s own father couldn’t be trusted to be alone with him. Dick slowly stopped coming to see him but he was lying to his family and our friends telling them he was coming to see him. I found out when I went outside that he would come to the hospital but he was just sleeping in his car the whole time.

Melissa was so amazing to the point when we had a family and Dr private meeting where normally the NICU nurses don’t go to these just the families and Drs. Well Melissa came to support us. I think dick had his mom and stepdad with him and it made me realize he didn’t have much of a team because when my family came in I had all my siblings and my parents. I had an army there compared to him. And it made me sad to see that. Unless he was still telling people nothing was wrong with Hayden so they didn’t feel they needed to come and support him for this talk. I honestly don’t know because Dick and I were slowly not talking to each other and if he did talk to me he would just be a dick to me and try his mind games with me to make me feel bad because I was with Hayden and not doing stuff with him, but he didn’t realize or want to understand what I was going through the fear of losing our son anyway, any moment. The new test results everyday the fear that his liver could just fail or his O2 would just stop working so many unknown things that were going in my head but he still didn’t care he was too mad at me because I was with Hayden and not at home with him.

We had this other amazing nurse Kathy. I will be honest when I first met her I thought I wasn’t gonna like her. I thought she was going to be this really mean lady. But I loved her. Her and my mom got along really well, she was just like Melissa and watching how she was with Hayden made me like her more every time I saw her. I could sit here and tell you what I liked about the 4 different nurses that I met and how much I liked them like amber was the first nurse we had the day Hayden was out into the NICU and the last nurse we had before we finally went home, Russel we had a couple times and he was amazing, he lived to talk but he understood what we were kinda going through because of his own kid, and Camas was so sweet with such a big heart as well. But explaining how much they all meant to me would take a lot away from my point of this whole blog. All I can say is without them Hayden wouldn’t have been able to home, my family and I wouldn’t have been able to stay so strong while being in the hospital. I wish I could tell or show them all how thankful I am for them I know they were all just doing their jobs but they really are super heroes and some of them I consider my friends to this day. ❤️